Semi-Rant # 1.5

Friends!

How many of us have themmmm.  Wait...I think I ranted/blogged about this back when Myspace was hot lol

oh well.  Oh friends/"friends".  Friend, a term I feel is used a lot more loosely than the L-word (lucifer) aka love.  "Why do you feel that way Marcus?".  Well, I'll tell you imaginary reporter.  A lot of times we, as people, have to define things, give things a title, you know how that is, for example, you've been talking to a guy/girl you met at starbucks or online for a couple of days, and yall connect, but you just want to be friends, an innocent bystander (family, for example) asks "ooo who is this new guy/girl?" and your reply is "he's/she's just a friend".  We've all done it, I'm not perfect and not here to judge anyone who has done it and still do it, its natural, its something we've done since childhood, I let you borrow my crayons, we talk about Power Rangers, and then I run home to my mom after school and tell her "I made a new friend today!"  The thing is, as we get older, we obviously start to see who our friends really are, and as disappointing as it is, I think we should be more understanding and learn from it, but to me it seems people just reach that point where they just start considering people close to them their "associates", just showing that they've obviously been burned one too many times by bad "friends", then turn around and go right back to the same thing.  A friendship is no different from a bf/gf relationship, you should look at the people you call friends and analyze them the same way you would with someone you want to marry or be with. Do you want this person to be in your life for a long time? can you share things with this person that you cant even share with your closest relatives?, Will this person hurt me? etc.  We tend to have levels to it though, like people have their levels of that L-word (luicfer) aka Love, which is understandable, you love a close friend like a brother but not like your husband/wife, but with this friend thing, people have levels like, they call someone a friend but dont even trust em' or they'll call someone their friend but, this person isnt enough of your friend to see you naked lol.  Im so serious about this part though, its a discussion I had with my ex once.  Females have many levels of "friend" its crazy and its weird to me.  A dude who considers a female a friend, I mean REALLY considers her a friend, would have no problem being naked around her, because he knows she doesnt look at him like that and he doesnt look at her like that so there's no room for "awkwardness" or w/e, but females? they have a "friend zone" type of friend, they have a "friend but not really a friend" friend, they have the female friend who she claims is only an "associate", and they keep guys around that just want sex who are also "friends".  That's not good dude, and its not EVERY female, and some dudes are the same way.  The ultimate test should be "would you get naked in front of them?" lol, especially when it comes to the opposite sex friends, which, I believe do and can exist, as long as you can sort real friends from, dudes/females that you had high sexual chemistry with, chances are, if you stop being friends with that person, they'll still be around when you want to be single again or you want to cheat on your bf/husband or gf/wife.  I think we need to give people, our friends, those most deserving...our all.  

Me personally, 

I like to give people my all, and sometimes it makes some of my closer female friends not feel as special, you know how that is when you'll say to a friend something like "I love you" and they'll be like "awww you do?" and you'll be like "yeah, I love everybody" and they'll get all mad and not feel special lol, but thats how I am, I try to give people my all, it usually turns out to be a not-so-good thing but, I'm trying to not let that effect me as much, I dont trust people, even my friends, as much as I used too, and its hard to explain because the trust is there, but when you've been hurt and done wrong so much, you just become a lot more cautious about certain things.  For example, a certain young lady I was talking to last year, we started having those long conversations, and we got closer, then, as expected, BAM, disappointment, automatically im like "thats why I don't get close to people".  I'm sure most of us have done it, I dont like it though, I feel like, the way I am, I have to mask my emotions all the time, and I cant just openly tell my friends how I feel about them as a friend, or if there's something more, but every time I am that old person i used to be, all trusting and expressive, etc., BAM, disappointment.  Alright this is turning into my blog post from a few days ago, Knowing and Feeling I believe, lol

Anywho

I'm sure we all have our own issues and observations when it comes to our friends and other peoples friends, its always fun to discuss, so leave a comment, Peace and mo Old Navy Fleece!